Selasa, 13 Juni 2017

How Will I Know When I Have Found “The One?”

How Will I Know When I Have Found “The One?”
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If I had a dime for every time someone asked me this question, I would be stinkin’ rich.

Lately I was talking with a friend who brought this question up. She is an independent woman, has a lot going for herself, and is perfectly content with her single state at the moment. Still yet, she can’t help but imagine what the person she will marry will be like, what qualities he will have, how they will meet, what he will look like, etc.

But the biggest question that she wanted an answer for is, how will I know I have found the right person?

“Now don’t say I will just know, I’m so tired of hearing that answer,” She said to me.

I couldn’t help but laugh, because I realized she wasn’t going to like my answer.

“Actually, it is actually more simple than you think it is. When God determines that the time is right, He will reveal that person to you in a light you never seen them in that way before.”

Sometimes the most beautiful things are so simple. God is love, He is the author of love, and you don’t have to force or stress anything because when the time comes, He will reveal who you will marry. He will guide your steps. But just stay close to Him. Embrace His love and stay in tune with his voice.

I used to stress this question, way more than I should have. If I had known then what I know now, I would have just trusted God. Because it literally is just that simple. In your heart, when the time comes you will know that is right person.

When God sees fit to bring your partner into your life, He will do so and reveal it to you when the time is right.

While I can’t give you a play by play of how it is going to go down when you meet the person you are going to marry, I do know that it will be unique, it will be wonderful, and it will be beautiful.

God  knows exactly what you need and when you need it. Our only job is to trust our Father, that He will give us all the things we need in His perfect timing.

The best advice I could give you is to relentlessly pursue God in your current season, be faithful to Him, and trust that He is preparing your future for you. His plans are to prosper you, and not to harm you. He wants to give you His best in life, and sometimes the best things in life take patience, because we aren’t ready for that stage of our life just yet.

You are a princess in preparation. Instead of stressing that you will “miss” the person that God has for your life, trust God that nothing in all the earth can stop what God has ordained. When God wants two people to be together, they will be, plain and simple. We don’t have to get ahead of ourselves, we can let God take the lead.

As a daughter/son of God look for qualities in a spouse that remind you of Jesus.

Does that person love you like Jesus?

How do they love others?

What is at the center of their heart?

Do they bear the fruits of the spirit?

Do they walk in love?

How do they act when no one else is watching?

God desires that we as Christians are equally yoked with our spouses. Equally yoked means to marry another believer who is on the same spiritual level as you. When you are both pushing and striving for God, you are moving in the same direction. If you marry an unbeliever, you will both be traveling in opposite directions, which is not the will of God in a marriage.

Strive to grow closer to God together. Pull each other toward God. Let God remain at the center of your marriage, and you will be blessed.

God is taking care of you and He loves you.

He has the very best in store for you, his precious child. You can trust that your Maker has everything under control, and that when you place your love story in God’s hands, He will give you a love so much better than any fairy tale you’ve ever seen.

Is it the Will of God?

How Will I Know It’s the Will of God?
Is it the Will of God?

Guest Post By: Laura Reyes

There comes a time in your life that you will meet the person that you have been praying for all along. There comes a sense of peace that truly does surpass all understanding. You see the hand of God in your relationship from the beginning.

When I started dating my husband I knew he was the one for me because everything I have ever prayed for and asked God for was being answered one by one. Those hidden desires in my heart that I didn’t even realize I wanted but God knew that I wanted, even if I didn’t tell Him about them.

God’s will is perfect, it doesn’t lack anything. God’s will brings joy and peace. He came at the perfect moment in my life, not when I was looking for him like crazy, but when I least expected it and with who I least imagined.

My husband and I will serve a lot in church together and we have these deep, long conversations. One day, before we started dating, while I was talking to him, I said to myself, “God, thank you for showing me that there are good guys out there and that there are guys who are respectful, loving, and pure.”

Little did I know that this guy, the one that God was using to show me these things, was the man that He had set aside for me.

I started to see life in a completely different way. Little by little, all of those hurts and the mentality I had about men was erased. Being with him encouraged me to seek God more and never in my life had I felt so sure about something.

Remember that God’s will doesn’t bring confusion so if you feel the slightest doubt, then you know it’s a sign for you to continuing seeking the voice of God.

The longer I was with him, the more that God used him to show me what real love was. It was a love that didn’t change its mind, that loved me even when I was acting a bit crazy, that was patient with me as God changed my insecurities. and that took care of me when I didn’t know my way.

He sought the Lord for our future and made sure that every decision we made was aligned to the will of God and then together we got on this journey called marriage that has forever changed my life.

So how do you know if they are the will of God? Who are you when you are with them? Do they bring you closer to God or do you feel like your relationship is making you drift away? You can find the answer in the word of God.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 says, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it’s not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trust, always hopes, and always perseveres. Love never fails.”

Love is patient: It’s willing to wait to hear from God to make the next move. It doesn’t rush things but desires to do things right. Love means being patient with your partner. Love waits for them and doesn’t get mad if there is something that they are not doing right.

Love is kind: It doesn’t hurt the other person. It uses kind words when speaking. It Doesn’t disrespect the other person, but has a heart of love and kindness. It knows that the person they have next to them was given to them by God.

Love does not boast; it is not proud: It doesn’t think they are always right. It doesn’t have a prideful attitude but is willing to lay down their desires to please the other person.

It is not self-seeking: It does not run the other way when they don’t get what they want.

It’s not easily angered: It has so much love for the other person that it’s hard for them to get upset. They are willing to talk and communicate about anything, and they know that there is nothing together that they cannot solve.

It keeps no record of wrongs: Forgiveness is a way of life for them. You realize that the other person is human and that there will be mistakes made, but you speak about what hurt you and you make the decision to completely forgive and never bring up again what was done. You forgive and you forget.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth: You realize that together you are a team and together you create a vision and goals that you both want to achieve. It does not become a competition. You don’t feel like you have to do something to impress the other person or to be better than them. You are so in love that when they are blessed, you are blessed and when they are hurt, you are hurt.

Love always protects: You don’t speak badly about them. You protect their image, you protect them from harm, and you are always looking out for their best interest.

Love always trust: You don’t worry about them cheating on you or doing something bad because you have complete trust in who they are. They never give you a reason to doubt them. You trust them with your most inner thoughts and secrets.

Love always hopes: Love has a plan, has a purpose, and together you create your mission statement. You seek God together and you realize that God has joined you together to complete one purpose and one assignment on earth.

Love always preserves: You are always pushing to strengthen your relationship and to reach your goals. If things are becoming a little bumpy you don’t give up but you seek God’s guidance. You persevere and push forward together.

Love never fails: Because what God has joined together, no man can ever separate.

Before You Choose A Life Partner, Read This

Before You Choose A Life Partner, Read This

Do you ever just have a dream that you know is from God?

The other night I had a spiritual dream that has lingered with me these last few days and I feel like it was for you, the person reading this.

In my dream, (I was observing from afar) I was watching individuals choose their partner, but it wasn’t just for their wedding day, they were choosing a partner to go to battle with. In my dream these couples trained together, took advice from their elders, were attending counseling together, and preparing for not only marriage but for war.

When I awoke, God started speaking to me about this dream.

What He told me was that when you choose the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with, you are not only choosing a husband/wife, you are choosing an accomplice, a partner in crime, a HELPER. (Where else have you heard the term helper? Genesis 2:18)

Life has a way of bringing you to your knees, and when that time comes, you are going to need someone fighting by your side rather than against you.
A wise woman in my life once told me, not too long after my husband and I got married, to remember that when the hard times came to remember he was my husband and not my enemy and to now allow the enemy to come between us.

Choosing a life partner is not something to take lightly. Choose someone who is going to fight this battle with you, serve God with you, and love you just as Christ loves the church, because you are going to need it.
Choose someone who displays Godly characteristics not just in the good times, but in the bad times as well.

Marry the person that is willing to get down on their hands and knees and intercede on your behalf when you are down in the pit. Marry the person who is going to go to war with you.

Marriage isn’t about the wedding day, there is much, much more to it. Does your relationship have the substance to make it through the long haul? Are you willing to stick around and not be ruled by your emotions but rather by the love of God and the covenant you have both made together?

This isn’t a light subject, so I hope you will not take it as so. God wants you to bless you with the kind of love story that only He can give, but you are going to need someone who will stick by your side when the world around you comes crashing in, and you will need to be that kind of person.

So again I say, choose wisely. Practice discernment when choosing a partner and most of all pray for them. Every time you get on your knees and pray for the person you are going to marry, before and after the wedding, you are going to war on their behalf.

It is worth it to ask yourself the hard questions now rather than later, and it is beyond important to pray for your future husband/wife and to seek God’s approval first and foremost on choosing a life partner/battle partner.

Minggu, 11 Juni 2017

Caritas dan Cupiditas : 2 macam cinta 😍

Seminar hr ini d RMCI Reformed Industri by Pdt. Ivan...
Emosi pengaruhi pikiran.
Hasrat lbh byk pengaruhi drpd pikiran.
Cinta ada objek.
Objek cinta terbesar adl Tuhan.
Cinta adl pemberat yg menggerakkan diri.
Jk cinta, biasanya mau berubah jd spt yg dia cintai.
Mns mencintai yg indah n baik.
Renungkan reaksi akibat kehilangan.

2 mcm cinta:
1. Caritas
Caritas tu tujuan utamanya adl Tuhan n slg membangun.
Dunia bukan sumber kebahagiaan.
Kasih yg melakukan kehendak Allah.
Mengasihi krn sdh pny kepenuhan kasih Tuhan.
Sm2 milik Tuhan.
Slg menghormati, berpartisipasi utk kebaikan yg dicintai.
Menyerahkan yg dicintai n diri untuk kedaulatan Allah.
Kalo ditolak, tetep bersyukur. Aku memang cinta dia, tp blm tentu Tuhan mau aku sm dia. Biar kehendak Tuhan yg tjd. (So swet ini)

2. Cupiditas
Tujuan utama diri sendiri, posesif.
Menghancurkan diri n pasangan.
Mendominasi n manipulasi, yg dicintai adl milik utk dimanfaatkan.
Hanya cintai berkat Tuhan.
Mencintai untuk mendapat makna n kepuasan.
Muncul iri, cemburu, kosong, cemburu.
Kompetisi spy bangga, pacaran cm buat pajangan n pameran spy dikagumi byk org. Benci kalo ditolak.
Cinta perlu waktu utk bertumbuh. Kian hari kian besar.
Kisah nyata:
Ada 2 pria mencintai 1 wanita..mereka ga rebutan kyk di bersaing scr sehat n buat jadwal jam pdkt..
Krn cintanya caritas, cowok yg ditolak n lihat tmennya jadian sm wanita yg dicintai itu dia bahagia2 aja. That's true love. Hm menurutku indah klo bs berteman gitu sih meski tdk jadian.. selama ini kok klo ditolak, kebykan berubah jd kyk org tdk kenal..
Smoga bs jadi org yg pny cinta caritas..

Senin, 05 Juni 2017


Aku ingin bercerita ttg kumpul2..
Dulu reuni sm sahabatku yg baru nikah tahun lalu..dia nasihatin kalo bs doa buat mertua, biar kalo dpt mertua itu yg menyayangi kita jadi rukun tiap hari..katanya kalo jodoh, sebeda apapun akan tetep cocok..kalo bukan, pasti ga cocok..
Stelah itu aku jg reunian sm tmn2 SMA ku..mereka tu nasihatin ttg cinta n itu smua ditujukan buatku..haha..
Berasa gmn gtu..pas reuni smp dulu jg gitu..intinya kalau cowok baik itu mendekati 1 wanita jaman sekarang jarang ada yg spt itu..kebanyakan pd tebar2 pesona dan membuat para cewek suka smua alias PHP..
Begitulah..aku maunya sm yg setia, bukan tebar2 pesona..
😀 hbs itu malah pd jodoh2in ke tmennya..aku aja br 1x ktemu..cape deh..wkwk..
Menurutku sih pria yg hrs berinisiatif, bukan wanita..
Selama ini memang slalu spt ga ada yg sepadan..drpd berat sebelah, nggak aja deh..
Kmaren baca buku jg..nikah itu bukan utk bahagia tp lakukan kehendak Tuhan..

Kamis, 25 Mei 2017


Aku jual buku2 p julianto.MINAT WA aku ya..

1. Kalau masih statusnya pacaran seharusnya cowok tidak menghidupi ceweknya. Misal, tidak membiayai, atau memberi uang bulanan, mobil ataupun rumah. Termasuk membeli rumah dengan uang berdua. Simpanlah hak-hak itu saat Anda sudah menikah.
2. Selama pacaran Cowok tidak boleh tinggal bersama-sama dalam satu rumah dengan ceweknya. Ingat, tantangan-tantangan hidup bersama adalah spesial milik Suami dan Istri. Misal saling memaafkan, memasak untuk pasangan, membersihkan rumah, merapikan dan mencuci baju, dll. Apalagi sampai ada godaan tidur bersama sebagai suami-istri. Simpanlah hak-hak itu sampai Anda menikah nanti.
3. Selama pacaran Anda harus membatasi dalam memberikan emosi dan keterbukaan pribadi. Jangan 100% atau semua anda ceritakan. Jika Anda sudah memberikan semuanya saat pacaran, dan ternyata hubungan kalian putus, maka sakitnya sangat luar biasa, menyisakan luka dan trauma yang dalam. Simpanlah hak-hak itu saat Anda sudah menikah dengan pasangan Anda.
Sebaliknya hal penting yang Anda lakukan selama pacaran:
4. Selama pacaran cari tahu keluarga asal masing-masing. Mengenali keluarga asal adalah prioritas selama Anda pacarana. Kenali juga dengan baik teman atau sahabat pacar Anda. Seberapa kuat relasi atau hubungan mereka.
5. Selama pacaran kenali latar belakang iman, spiritualitas dan keaktifan pacar Anda di Gereja. Apakah sinkron dengan kebutuhan dan kepribadian Anda. Apakah bisa anda terima dengan lapang hati atau terpaksa
6. Kenali kepribadian pasangan Anda yang terdalam lewat psikotes dengan psikolog. Juga kesehatan fisik lewat pemeriksaan menyeluruh atau general check-up. Lalu, diskusikanlah penemuan itu dengan professional konselor. Apakah perbedaan dan persamaan yang ada cukup nyaman dijalani seumur hidup dalam pernikahan.
Julianto Simanjuntak
•Habis obrolan Pagi dengan si bungsu Moze ada diskusi yang hangat tentang sejauh mana hak-hak selama pacaran.•

Jangan Pernah Mengemis Cinta

Hai2 aku jual byk cocok sedikit cekcok loh...minat pm me ya...

Jangan Pernah Mengemis Cinta
Dr. Julianto Simanjuntak
Janganlah pernah mengemis cinta. Cinta sejati tidak bertepuk sebelah tangan. Jangan pernah membangun hubungan cinta di atas perasaan takut. Dalam cinta tidak ada ketakutan, sebaliknya keberanian, sejahtera dan penguasaan diri........
Tak jarang kami menerima klien yang mengalami patah hati. Ada yang patah hati karena ditolak saat menyatakan cinta untuk pertama kali. Ada juga mereka yang hubungan cintanya diputuskan sepihak oleh sang pacar.
Reaksi orang yang cintanya ditolak atau diputuskan beragam. Ada yang Malu dan kecewa. Kadang disertai perasaan marah dan sedih. Ini normal, apalagi saat tahu, bahwa sang pacar sudah mendapatkan gandengan baru. Pada beberapa kasus disertai perasaan putus asa hingga depresi dan ada juga sampai bunuh diri.
Naksir itu Normal
Jika anda tertarik pada seorang gadis atau sebaliknya, itu wajar. Naksir adalah perasaan normal saat Anda mulai memasuki usia remaja. Sebab itu seiring dengan masa puber dan bertumbuhnya hormon seksual. Namun apakah perasaan suka dan tertarik itu langsung disampaikan pada yang bersangkutan? Ohhh tunggu dulu. Anda perlu menimbang dengan bijak, apakah sahabat Anda itu juga punya perasaan yang sama.
Cinta itu mengikat dua hati. Cinta sejati tidaklah bertepuk sebelah tangan. Cinta itu tidak melulu emosi atau perasaan. Cinta melibatkan logika dan kehendak.
Alarm Cinta
Cinta punya tanda. Jika tidak ada tanda-tanda, sebaiknya tunda dulu menyatakannya. Cinta sejati bisa menguasai diri. Lalu kapan dong menyatakan perasaan itu? Tunggu waktu yang tepat. Tunggu saat dimana sahabat Anda itu menunjukkan respon bahwa diapun memperhatikan Anda. Saya menyebutnya "alarm" cinta.
Bagaimana caranya tahu? Biasanya perasaan cinta nampak dari beberapa hal. Dia suka memandang kita baik langsung atau diam-diam. Dia suka menghubungi Anda langsung atau via sarana komunikasi lainnya. Senang bertemu Anda dan bercakap-cakap. Kadang dia memberikan sesuatu barang atau makanan kesukaanmu. Memberikan Perhatian saat Anda sakit atau ulangtahun. Sepertinya Anda istimewa dimatanya.
Jika Anda suka, dan ada tanda-tanda dia juga suka dengan Anda baru pertimbangkan untuk menyampaikan perasaan itu.
Bila Cinta Anda Ditolak
Bila anda menyampaikan perasaan sayang atau cinta, harap menyiapkan diri andai cinta anda ternyata ditolak. Kenapa?
Jangan lupa sebagian sahabat menaruh perhatian kepada kita, bukan karena dia mau menjadi pacar kita. Tetapi dia hanya merasa cocok atau nyambung dengan kita. Atau dia merasa Anda sebagai kakak atau Abang yang baik. biasanya sahabat Anda akan menolak dengan baik.
Yang lebih menyakitkan adalah jika tidak ada tanda-tanda Saudara langsung nembak sasaran. Bisa-bisa yang bersangkutan menolak dengan ketus, dengan nada merendahkan. Nah, semoga anda tidak mengalami hal ini.
Jika cinta ditolak wajar Anda menjadi sedih, kecewa dan marah. Semua perasaan itu wajar saja. Perasaan tertolak adalah salah satu pengalaman menyakitkan bagi siapapun. Namun yang terpenting apakah Anda membiarkan diri terus menerus dirundung kekecewaan, kesedihan dan kemarahan. Atau Anda berusaha bangkit kembali, dan mencoba menata ulang perasaan, hidup dan masa depan.
Bila Cinta Diputuskan Sepihak
Hal yang lebih sakit adalah saat anda sudah berpacaran sekian lama, kemudian diputuskan sepihak oleh pacar. Reaksi umum adalah sedih, kecewa dan marah.
Harus Anda sadari bahwa pacaran adalah masa saling mengenal dan belum mengikat. Jika salah satu dari kalian merasa tidak cocok, wajar saja dia memutuskan hubungan. Termasuk jika dia ternyata menemukan cowok atau cewek yang lebih oke daripada Anda.
Jika dia memutuskan itu artinya dia tidak mencintai Anda lagi. Pertanda bahwa dia tidak merasa cocok lagi dengan Anda. Jangan pernah mengemis cinta. Cinta sejati memberi tanpa diminta. Jadi jika cinta pasangan anda sudah tawar, dan dia pindah ke lain hati maka lebih baik menahan diri.
Cinta sejati dalam pacaran mentautkan dua hati. Tidak boleh hanya satu yang mencintai. Tidak boleh anda memaksakan cinta Anda untuk diterima. Jangan sampai Anda mengancam pacar Anda. Itu tanda Anda tidak matang.
Intinya, jangan pernah membangun hubungan cinta di atas perasaan takut. Dalam cinta sejati tidak ada ketakutan. Yang adalah keberanian, sejahtera dan penguasaan diri.
Membuka Lembaran Baru
Jika relasi kita retak dan patah apa yang kita lakukan? Saya meminjam istilah Samuel Mulia di Kompas Minggu 3 Juli, janganlah punya mental pengelem. Relasi atau hubungan itu laksana sebuah gelas. Kadang lebih baik kita membiarkannya pecah daripada mencoba melukai diri sendiri dengan berusaha memperbaikinya seperti sedia kala.
Tulisannya yang berjudul “Patah” mengajak kita belajar berani melihat keretakan hubungan, kemudian membiarkannya patah/pecah. Lalu mengajak kita melanjutkan perjalanan baru. Jangan menjadi pengelem, yang berusaha melem ulang keretakan hubungan. Kita akan lelah sendiri membenahi keretakan itu.
Kenapa tidak "membeli" gelas baru. Gelas yang memberi harapan dan semangat baru. Asal kita bijak memilih gelas baru tersebut. Intinya Jangan buang energi Anda secara sia-sia hanya untuk melem hal yang tak mungkin lagi dilem.
Dalam penutupnya Samuel berkata: " Saya harus belajar berani kehilangan dan berani menempuh sebuah perjalanan baru meskipun untuk kehilangan selalu saja bisa terjadi. Membiarkan itu patah juga supaya saya tidak egois, supaya teman saya itu bisa bahagia. Karena upaya saya menyambungkan kembali belum tentu membahagiakannya."
Nah, jika Anda diputuskan pacar maka belajarlah menerima kenyataan ini sambil berpengharapan menatap masa depan. Bahwa sesungguhnya ada calon teman hidup terbaik yang disiapkan-Nya bagi Anda. Hanya perlu sedikit kesabaran. Biarlah rasa sedih, sakit, pahit, marah dan kecewa Anda alami sesaat. Menangislah sepuasnya sekarang daripada Anda menderita selamanya.
Julianto Simanjuntak
Dari Buku “Banyak Cocok Sedikit Cekcok” (Julianto Simanjuntak )