Hikmat ttg keluarga, pernikahan dan komunitas

Ini catatan khotbah plus IG ttg keluarga,pernikahan dan komunitas...

Love n relationship

Firman CG kemarin... dr ko Ted...kutambahi opini...
ada gbr kesaksian c Cella n ko DM jg..

Cinta itu penguasaan diri n tdk cemburu, sabar n slg menerima.
Tdk melakukan hal tdk sopan.
Asmara itu tdk sabar n hawa nafsu.
Cinta slg jaga kekudusan.
Jgn beri barang2 mahal sblm pacaran.murah gpp klo pas ada event..wkwk..asalkan tulus, ga berharap..

Seks dr Tuhan jd kudus, hrs dlm pernikahan.
Jauhi godaan seks+Pornografi.
1 Yoh 1:9 akui dosa

Pacaran bangun hub. Utk pertunangan n pernikahan, bukan coba2.
Mengenal byk org sblm pacaran. Wkt pacaran, jgn tebar2 pesona. Pengenalan jg bukan tebar2 pesona, tp berteman scr sehat..beramai2 n seperlunya, tdk terlalu sering.

Sulit dpt pacar krn:
1. Standar tdk realistis

Standar Mutlak/wajib smuanya
-lahir baru
-cinta Tuhan (gbr diri pulih)
-sepadan

Tdk mutlak
-budaya
-kebiasaan
-suku

2. Blm siap meninggalkan keluarga, blm pny inner beauty, byk khawatir
Jgn mau dgn pria yg gaje.
Pria hrs pny visi. Mau dibawa k mn hubungan itu?

Pacaran jgn terlalu eksklusif. Perlu komunikasi terbuka, tp jg perlu beramai2. Jgn sampai ga pny temen2 gara2 keasikan berdua terus.Komunitas itu penting.

Dlm pacaran belajar:
Kenal lebih ttg kebiasaan, sifat n kepribadian.
Komunikasi
Menerima
Buka diri n hati, jujur.
Percaya

2 tim 2:22
Titus 2:6

Tdk boleh:
Pegangan n pelukan
Kissing ciuman
Petting meraba2
ML bersegama

3 tanda jodoh dr Tuhan
1.Iman yg sejati pd Tuhan
Penerimaan d keluarga, kerapian, nilai diri sehat.

2.Tuhan yg mendominasi pertemuan 2 insan.
Bukan org itu sengaja cari2 n kenalan2 sm byk lawan jenis yg cakep tiap hari (kyk org kurang kerjaan), tp fokus pd Tuhan, trus  didekatkan gtu sm Tuhan seiring berjlnnya wkt..

3.Slg mencintai n menerima apa adanya dia plus keluarganya.
Marry your bestfriend. 

Tantangan dlm relationship:
Restu ortu
Beda suku, adat, prinsip
Sosial n pendidikan

Hrs ada restu. Hrs berjuang. Tuhan akan menolong jika dia org yg tepat.
Jika bukan Tuhan yg bangun rumah, sia2lah semua. Jd hrs minta petunjuk Tuhan sebelum mulai.

6 Ways To Tell If He’s The One For You

6 Ways To Tell If He’s The One For You
http://theprayingwoman.com/is-he-the-one-youve-been-waiting-for-ways-to-tell-if-hes-the-one/

By TPW
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is he the one

Many women have a long, detailed list full of the qualities they desire in a man, and sometimes this can backfire because there is no such thing as a “perfect” man.

There is however, a man who is perfect for you. The one God has selected for you.

When you look at your list of desired qualities, a few of them should jump out at you as non-negotiables. These are the things that you shouldn’t bend or compromise on.

Whatever your must haves are, if he’s the one, you won’t have to compromise your non-negotiables or ever feel like you’re settling.

Whatever it is that you desire, pray about it, and let God send you the one He has for you.



Single-Saved ladies, If you’re at a crossroad in your relationship and you’re not sure if he’s God sent, here are 6 Ways To Tell If He’s The One For You:

1 His Faith

He shares the same passion for Christ as you. You’re not unequally yoked. When it comes to your relationship, God is first. He respects your morals and values and doesn’t try to force or encourage you to stray away from them.

2. You trust him.

I’m not just talking about him being faithful to you. Although that is a huge part of the equation as well.

Trust goes well beyond cheating.

Do you trust him with your life?

Do you trust his judgement on important issues?

Are you comfortable sharing your goals and dreams with him, no matter how far fetched they may seem, and more importantly, do you trust that he’ll support you in any way that he can?

Are you open to his views and hopes for the future as well?

Think of trust like the foundation of the life you’re building together…if it’s shaky, everything else will be too .

3. He accepts you… Flaws and all

Are you able to be your authentic self 24/7 with him?

We’re talking bad days, good days, and yep, P.M.S. days.

He accepts you for who you are right now, not who you want to be and never tries to change you. He respects you and everything you stand for. Your past may not be a pretty one, but he encourages you to share your testimony. He doesn’t try to silence you. He’s not ashamed of you or your testimony.

We all have those sides to ourselves that we might not be too proud of, things we’d rather hide, and maybe even a slew of annoying habits, but you should never have to fake it in a relationship. You’ll know he is the one if he not only sticks around through it all, but falls in love with you even more in spite of it all.

4. He’s your best friend.

I hate to sound cheesy, but the best marriages are the ones where the couple would count their partner as not only a partner, but their best friend as well.

They don’t just love each other…they like each other. A lot.

This doesn’t mean that you ditch your girls and expect him to cancel his weekly basketball game in order to go shopping with you.

It simply means that he’s the first person you call when you need to talk something out or have big news to share.

Additionally, it means that you genuinely enjoy spending time together.

5. Communication is Key

Everything is not always peachy in your relationship, but the two of you know how to respectfully disagree with one another and nip it in the bud.

You can tell each other the truth in a loving manner and be heard. You may not always like it, but you respect it.

The both of you love each other enough to move beyond your disagreements in a mature manner and forgive quickly.

6. You can see yourself submitting to him

I’ve talked to a lot of women in my years of ministry and this subject is always a touchy one.

Even though the Bible is straight forward on this subject and makes it clear that we are to submit to our husbands, many women struggle in this area.

But I’ve noticed that one of the most common reasons why women of today have a problem with submitting to their husbands is “they don’t think their husbands are fit to lead”.

This is the main reason we are not to be unequally yoked before entering a marriage.

This is also the reason, we should marry someone we know we can trust. You’d be surprised how many women will enter into a marriage with a man they already know they don’t trust.

Don’t get married with the assumption that marriage will fix all of the problems that are already there in your relationship.

The problems you get comfortable dealing with in a dating relationship, will become the problems you get comfortable dealing with in your marriage.

Book Review: I Kissed Dating Goodbye (English version)

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The book I Kissed Dating Goodbye discusses biblical perspectives on relationships that honor the Lord. If we adopt a wrong attitude toward relationships, God will not be pleased. Engaging in frivolous and one-off relationships with random people can seem adventurous and maybe even fun to some, but the Bible clearly states the folly of sex before marriage. “For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a person is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God” (Ephesians 5:5 NIV).
The price we have to pay if we engage in open relationships is: to be denied any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God.
Joshua Harris uses lessons taught in the Word of God to encourage us to commit to having a relationship that builds on mutual trust and understanding, as well as to keep our hearts, emotions, lips, and bodies pure in order to please Christ.
Joshua Harris divides his book into 4 parts:
The first part talks about how we can avoid defective dating and reinforces the idea of commitment in a relationship.
The second section teaches us about the true definition of love and how we can strive to achieve purity in our relationships. He states that in order for healthy relationships to take place, we need to practice purity, patience and commitment, coupled with Christ’s mercy. We should not pursue members of the opposite sex just for fun. Instead, we should have pure intentions when building friendships with them.
Next, he expounds on how we can build a new lifestyle and get back on track with God’s plans for our life.
Lastly, the fourth and final part teaches us how to look ahead in our relationships towards the end goal of marriage and what qualities we should look for in a life partner.
From this book, I was reminded that our Lord is the most significant one in our life. Even when we have a boyfriend or girlfriend, he or she cannot, and should not take the place of God in our hearts. He possesses 100 percent of our heart, mind, and body and they are to be used for His Kingdom’s cause.
I have learned that true love is more beautiful and precious than short-term infatuation and that we should not date carelessly if we are not ready to get married. It is important to guard our hearts against impurity and from disobeying the Lord’s will so as to keep others and ourselves from being hurt.

“Having a girlfriend was no longer my greatest need. Knowing and obeying Him was. I wanted to please Him in my relationships even if it meant looking radical and foolish to other people—even if it meant kissing dating goodbye.” —Joshua Harris

I Kissed Dating Goodbye is useful for anyone who seeks to understand more about glorifying God and on how to love others.

 My review was published on http://ymiblogging.org/2013/06/book-review-i-kissed-dating-goodbye-by-joshua-harris/